Black Mambas and Suicide Bombers. I say that to myself anytime I find myself stressed out and feeling sorry for myself. I say it often. Sometimes hourly.
Ya know those things in life that stress us out, but when put in perspective shouldn't really? The car won't start and it's the first day of work. Can't find the $400 Droid.Can't get online to check my account.I think the kid is smoking weed, I think my man is cheating it goes on and on. I'm not saying these things are not things to be upset over. I have freaked out over almost every one of those examples at one time or another in my life. I even let the stress turn into depression messing up entire days, weeks even messing up other peoples days and weeks. I'm saying our lives could be so much worse.
Now when faced with crap like that, I just say Black Mambas and Suicide Bombers.
See even though my lost celly is hella annoying, at some point I realized how much worse my life could be. I could be living in a Jungle somewhere having to walk up a mountain with a bowl on my head everyday past black mambas and tigers to get clean water. I have seen those people on The Discovery Channel doing just that and they look happy as clams. Hungry to us in the um...US is having to resort to Oodles of Noodles.
I'm sitting in Starbucks I can't get online and can't figure out why and really really need to check my online work schedule and it pisses me off. For a second. Then I realize that if I was sitting in a cafe in another part of the world the woman who just walked in might just...ya know blow the fuck up. Not alot of suicide bombers in GA Starbucks. So few in fact we hardly ever think about it. Suddenly not being able to log in while sipping my $6.00 Mocha Grande seems sorta petty. I could be laying on the floor embedded with nails and shrapnel. There are people who today had to ponder that fact when deciding where to go get coffee or java or whatever the hell they drink in the Mid East.
Do I need to say more? Black Mambas and Suicide Bombers. The next time the remote seems sooooooo far away on that coffee table and u just got comfortable just say it....
4 comments:
Word.
Need to make a t-shirt!
Speaking of stress, this weekend will be the tenth anniversary of 9/11 and I pick this week to fly across country and back.....WTF was I thinking?!?
Every time I hear the term "Black Mamba", it makes me laugh. Its because thats the nickname Kobe Bryant gave himself. I guess to describe he was a killer basketball player... maybe. Whatever...
Its always funny to me cuz this was AFTER his much publicized rape charges. You know the story where he "allegedly" had butt sex with a white girl in a Denver hotel. Then bought his wife a 4 million dollar diamond so she wouldn't divorce his ass.
Seems like a bad PR move to me. "Hmm... I need a nickname... nothing has stuck. Maybe there aren't enough people that think I'm a scum bag for cheating on my wife...I'll call myself a "The Black Mamba"... Yea, great idea. funny.
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